Beautiful Seed

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About Me

Josie aka Kylie
Child of God
20
16th May'88
NYP-Banking&financial service FS0503
DBS Financial Executive

Desires

Grow stronger in WOG
Desperately need to shed off the fats
Travelling..* BKK, TW, HK, JAP,NY, ENG, Paris
Good job, good pay

Friday, October 06, 2006

Have my CS ica today.. sadz.. i think i would fair badly for this test.. all the questions seems so alien to me.. maybe i didnt prepare well enuff for this test... last minute read up.. first i was late for the test and walked at the ultra super speed from station to lec hall and perspired.hate that kind of feeling. after that thinking that i could finish up my proj but i left my thumbdrive at home.. argh! had to go back and take(is a mistake)... i was very tired today.. was not interested in any of the things. sorry that i couldnt contribute much in the CS discussion today.. when i reached home, rest a while thinking of taking a nap before going back to sch to chiong for proj and meet ping..

Then who knows i could only enjoy few minutes of rest.. my nightmare started.. today is her off day then as usual she stayed at home the whole day long tidy the house. she barged into my room screaming at me and asked me to pack and tidy up my room.. then due to my tiredness i replied her that i would do it at night.. suddenly she become very agitated and started scolding and saying all the hurtful stuff..i tried to understand her and filter them off but they were so sharp that every word pierce into my heart.. then as i continued to pack she continue to scold.. i didnt argue with her, jus ignored and packed my stuff quietly.. i finished at 4plus..at last~ but it was too late le so i decided not to go back to sch and i went to take a nap..

woke up at 7pm, had my dinner then wanted to on the com to do proj. then she came out from the room again to scream at me AGAIN...this time round is that i didnt on the light near my com.. then i told her that the light bulb was spoilt.. her reaction was great!! scolding me for being irresponsible blar blar.. and her scolding come in again..this time was more severe than the afternoon one..bringing up the past issues and blaming me for some of the things that happening now. i really couldnt hold back and i started to tear uncontrollably.. since some time that i cried le..now my eyes are so sore hope would be better by tml then.

i really couldnt take the pressure anymore!! always standing between them were very tiring.. i had to face his nasty attitude and her unreasonable temper..she started to ask alot of weird question and forced me to ans..and i were forced to answer those "model" ans though not from the bottom of my heart, if not she would continue to scold. then always complaint that she does all the housework the laundry dont have time for herself even on her off day but who asked her to do all those thing!? NO ONE!!! she wanted to do it, no one forced her! no one treat her as maid arz.. I CAN do my own laundry i CAN settle my own meals i CAN clean up my room!! so why complaining on stuff that u wanted to do it!! i wondered if i had changed or is she the one had changed?? at times i really feel that the best is that i dun nid to see her. People only remember what others had done wrong and never remember wat others had done good for you.

reflecting~~